My role as Father to Claire & Nick comes AFTER my role as Husband to Deb. The most important thing I can do to love my kids is to demonstrate unconditional love toward my wife.
Here are some verses that speak to me.
I rest in this promise, that God has them, that though they may stray, they will indeed return since they were raised in the Lord.
Train up a child in the way he should go,
Even when he is old he will not depart from it.
– Proverbs 22:6
I never really had to spank my kids, but I certainly am not opposed to it. The purpose of physical discipline is to correct them. If you’re hitting them in anger, that is wrong. I also understand that I am an imperfect father. Sometimes kids need grace and encouragement, i.e. the carrot, and sometimes they need the stick. I don’t always get this right, but when our Heavenly Father parents us, He does it correctly every time.
He who withholds his rod hates his son,
But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
– Proverbs 13:24
Do not hold back discipline from the child,
Although you strike him with the rod, he will not die.
You shall strike him with the rod
And rescue his soul from Sheol.
– Proverbs 23:13-14
This one doesn’t necessarily apply to children, but in this context, I believe it supports the verses on discipline. A true friend will tell you what you NEED to hear (gently), not what you WANT to hear. It is not loving to do otherwise.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend,
But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.
– Proverbs 27:6